New Year’s: It Is Infact A New Year

Sometimes I just have words to say, Sometimes I just want to say words.

Oh also I've created these new anecdote/context/story boxes because I've wanted to use columns and now I have a “fun” excuse.

I originally wanted to write a story about New Year’s, but nothing arrived on the doorstep of my mind. I had an idea where the story would start in the third person, describing something. But then that something would arrive on your doorstep, shifting everything into the second perspective (my favorite). I kept toying with this idea but could not get any good metaphors or like anything out of it. Of course, I could just do a normal metaphor, but I have a terrible habit of avoiding the normal at all costs when making things so. It kinda worked if I wanted to write about the failure/success of New Year’s resolutions, but eeehhhhhh. That sounds boring or whatever, I don't really do those so it's not a topic that I find personally fulfilling. So oh well, no interesting story about personal growth taking place on New Year’s, spanning different perspectives and making the reader think. So what am I currently doing writing at 2 in the morning?

I don't want to make good art?

I've come across a horrifying thought this week. I've been learning about what things I can intentionally do to make my art better, like picking color palettes based on color theory, or intentionally choosing instruments to get a specific feeling I want to get out of art. But everytime I learn these things, my brain just kinda says, “Well I’d rather just wing it and see what happens.” I let the art take me where it would like to go, finding itself a new uncharted territory. But most all of the time, this leaves art feeling aimless and random.

I recently tried doing figure drawing with a character of mine. I had never done it before but for a fairly spur of the moment desire, the final product turned out pretty nicely. But if I wanted to get really good at it I would have to figure out where all light sources are, and where reflections are, instead of just going “I think a shadow would go here.”

The worrying thought I had was, “Do I have the capability or drive to make art with direction? but more importantly: is that something I even want to do?”

Answering the question

So why am I writing this at 2:30 in the morning? Sometimes writing helps me understand my thoughts better. I also still wanted to make a New Year’s post, even if this is not what I wanted to write about.

Hold on, I have an idea…

A New Year’s story

There was once a short story written in the early hours of the morning. A spur of the moment decision by the author. The story used several instances of repetition for emphasis and was very meta (much to the author's chagrin). The story was about the idea of mindless art vs intentional art, or whatever. After writing the story the author had no idea what to do with it, until… an idea.

At approximately 11:27 PM on New Year’s Eve you hear your doorbell ring. Expecting either a person or a case of ding dong ditchers, you are much more perplexed to find a letter on your doorstep. You cautiously look around but find the world deserted, so you take the letter into the warmth of your home. You glance over the unrecognizable handwriting and read the letter to yourself. The letter seems interesting for sure but you don't fully know what to think. After finishing the letter you let its final lines roll around in your head before you fall asleep. “To whoever finds this letter, I hope that it finds a good home within your mind.”

Wow look, another type of formatting to get to know, the “I wanted to put more stuff in this post but couldn't fit it in” text box. An author's notes if you will. I just want to say that I find it funny that instead of posting a post with direction, all I did was post another aimless post that feels like it could mean something but also ehhhh. You know I do have posts with directions planned. Heck I even have one that is like 90% finished, It’s about labels and identity and stuff but like, It's very telling that all my posts are about how I never finish art. So I leave myself with this New Year’s resolution for someone who doesn’t like New Year’s resolutions. Figure out if art with direction is even something that you want to aspire towards. And if it is, please, please Please do something about it. That goes for anyone else reading this, I'm starting to think there's nothing wrong with directionless art, maybe I’ll make a post made with direction about it one day (ha). To whoever finds this blog post, I hope that it finds a good home within your mind.